"Football kickers are like taxi cabs," opined legendary coach Buddy Ryan, reasoning, "You can always go out and hire another one." While Ryan may not have been a buddy to the kicking community, his dismissive quip is indicative of the general lack of respect afforded the profession. If Rodney Dangerfield had been a football player, he would have been a kicker. This is despite the fact that nine of the top ten top points scorers in NFL history are kickers. In a game where offense sells seats, those putting the most points on the board are the least appreciated. Such is the case for Dustin Hopkins (pictured, characteristically kicking). The 31-year-old kicked for the Buffalo Bills and New Orleans Saints before settling into a groove in Washington, D.C., home of what is now known as the Washington Football Team (WFT). Since 2015, Hopkins has made 84% of his field goals, slightly above the league average for the same span. Despite such reliability, Hopkins was released by the WFT last Wednesday. After composing himself, Hopkins composed a message to the fans inside the Beltway. "We've experienced a lot of highs and lows together," wrote Hopkins, likely with his thumbs on the latest iPhone. "I'm grateful for all of those memories and every moment in between." Hopkins gave a special shout out to punter Tress Way, pictured here performing his side hustle as the holder for one of Hopkins' 163 made field goals. While anyone who has seen "Ace Ventura" knows the importance of keeping the laces out, Hopkins cited Way's many other positive influences in his life. "Tress, I would like to thank you least for all your holding... which has been amazing as long as I've known you," wrote Hopkins. "I want to extend a bigger thank you for being someone who throughout our friendship has helped to sharpen me as a follower of Christ, man, husband, father, son, friend and most importantly... ping-pong player." Yes, it seems the beginning of the end of the Mr. Hopkins Goes to Washington era may have arrived with new coach Ron Rivera in 2020. The no-nonsense Rivera immediately purged the popular ping-pong table where Hopkins, Way and long snapper Nick Sundberg had reigned supreme over the 53-man roster. Despite the pain of being fired, Hopkins has landed on his feet. As of today, he is the newest member of the Los Angeles Chargers. The million dollar question, of course, is whether they have a ping-pong table, and if so, will Hopkins have any competition? While he and his ilk may never get the respect they deserve, kickers like Dustin Hopkins will go on racking up the most points in America's favorite game, as dependable (and as taken for granted) as taxi cabs.

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